I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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