He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Randomize