she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize
