Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
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