No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Randomize