When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
Randomize
