belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Randomize