Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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