You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
I just want to make out with him forever
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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