She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
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