I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
please don't call me when you're wasted. i don't feel like having any other future arguments at 3:18am about how to hang up your phone. you have a flip phone, you should know regardless of how fucked up you are.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
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