last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
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