i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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