belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
