I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Ladies don't puke and tell
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
