i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
