So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
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