So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Turn sideways at McDonald's = actual directions to a winery
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize