I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
Idk if I want to put a bra on
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
