Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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