have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
