You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
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