well you can't waste a boner
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
