Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
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