ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
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