I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Randomize
