If that was your dad, he is hot
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
