singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
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