:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
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