so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Randomize