Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
Randomize
