Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
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