TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
Randomize
