were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
it was like eating out sand paper
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
Randomize
