So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
