PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
Slut skills are useful in every country.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
Randomize
