Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
whose ass print is on the piano?
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
Randomize
