i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
