i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
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My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
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Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
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