We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Panties = found
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