So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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