Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Randomize
