Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
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