White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Randomize
