We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
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