allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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