whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
I'm gonna fight the coyote
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
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