Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
Randomize