Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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