Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
